humor

What Good Is Algebra?

Wherein an ex-algebra teacher makes a case for not being gullible

OK, students, get a piece of scratch paper and a sharp pencil. It’s time for a good old-fashioned Algebra story problem. (No, you may not use your iAnything or your calculator. Paper. Pencil. Period.)

Sam took his second semester English test. The task at hand was to find all the spelling and grammar errors. He found 92. He flunked the test. His teacher told him he only found 6.7% of the errors! What was the total number of errors to be found on that English test?

(Remember this post is intended to show you just how useful Algebra is in Real Life!)

If you know elementary Algebra, you know that asking the right question is key to writing the right equation. And that is key to getting the right answer. Here’s The Question: Read it all

I Got Me a New Nephew

So I featured myself in a nice, impromptu, little photoshoot with some neat props.

Here he is, singing with my niece at their wedding reception this past Saturday afternoon:

Brandon and Karina Boss singing at their reception
Karina and Brandon Boss singing with their youth group

And there they are again:

Brandon and Karina (Roth) Boss with their youth group
Youth group: Hopewell Mennonite Church

And here are his new aunt and cousins (the latter who also served as bride’s maids):

Ruby Roth and bride's maid daughters
My wife and daughters!

For myself of myself, while the rest of the morning pre-wedding crew was out photographing up a storm, I “snuck” into the reception hall for a little photo shoot of my own:

Mark Roth before Brandon and Karina's reception
Self-Portrait: “Crazy Uncles Belong in the Corner”

Of that last one, original-size copies are available for download for a mere $3 donation. Don’t miss your opportunity to own your own classic.

🙄

Flying With Child

Dave Barry takes an imaginary journey, starting this way:

We set out with a sense of foreboding. If you ever feel a boding, and later on something bad happens, that was a foreboding.

We were traveling from Miami to Minnesota, a state located near, or possibly inside, Canada. The reason we felt a boding was that we were carrying a live baby, and we had stupidly elected to travel by airplane. I think that, instead of making such a big deal about weapons, the airlines ought to start cracking down on babies.

So………………………………was he trying to be funny or dumb?

When I had the opportunity to travel (kinda) with Benjie G, he was a super baby traveler. By air. By land. Wow!

She Wants Attention

That’s what crossed my mind as I read her article.

OK, so I’ll call some her way. 🙄

Giving Up on God

As Republicans sort out the reasons for their defeat, they likely will overlook or dismiss the gorilla in the pulpit.

Three little letters, great big problem: G-O-D.

I’m bathing in holy water as I type.

To be more specific, the evangelical, right-wing, oogedy-boogedy branch of the GOP is what ails the erstwhile conservative party and will continue to afflict and marginalize its constituents if reckoning doesn’t soon cometh.

Ma’am, God is a great big problem. You got a problem with that?

She continues:

Simply put: Armband religion is killing the Republican Party.

Armband religion — that’s the problem, not God!

What everyone needs is a heart-strings, shoe-strings, purse-strings religion — sincere, genuine, committed, liveable.

And there’s more from KP:

So it has been for the Grand Old Party since the 1980s or so, as it has become increasingly beholden to an element that used to be relegated to wooden crates on street corners.

I say the world needs more preachers “doing” the Gospel on wooden crates on street corners rather than “doing” politics on plush platforms in religiousy buildings.

Then, enveloped in smoke while blindfolded, she adds:

Which is to say, the GOP has surrendered its high ground to its lowest brows.

Oh my! 😯 What makes them “lowest brows”? (Please note: The question does not imply disagreement with the statement.)

And what do you make of this assertion?

And shifting demographics suggest that the Republican Party — and conservatism with it — eventually will die out unless religion is returned to the privacy of one’s heart where it belongs.

It belongs there, yes.

But not to stay there!

And if that’s true of religion, it’s far more true of Jesus Christ.

He belongs in the privacy of your heart. And from there He will live out His life through yours.

Now, one more comment from Kathleen Parker:

Meanwhile, it isn’t necessary to evict the Creator from the public square, surrender Judeo-Christian values or diminish the value of faith in America.

Oh?

Breaking News Thought: Does this mean she supports nativity scenes in the public square?

Now for the funniest part of the article:

Kathleen Parker

I think somebody at the Washington Post better fix that!

HT: Harris, commenting over at WorldMagBlog.

Above all, love God!